During my first year of college, my roommate was a friend from high school. We communicated that we wanted to be roommates over the summer, and because I knew her, I thought, “Oh, I don’t need to talk to her about anything ahead of time.” After living with a roommate, I’ve realized you should talk deeply and set expectations no matter how close you are. It’ll help you both acclimate and help each other if you have a new roommate or will in the future. Be sure to reference these tips to help develop a strong roommate relationship. 

Understand your Habits  

When living alone or at home in your own room, you don’t fully understand your habits; I certainly didn’t know mine. I didn’t realize I did things that annoyed my roommate, and she didn’t think she did things that annoyed me. It’s essential to reflect on your habits, including when you like to do homework, if you play music while working, or even little things like leaving your shoes out. Minor things could bother someone, and it’s essential to understand you’re living with someone else; you don’t have your own “private space.” Consider reflecting on your habits and discussing them with your roommate before moving in. It might seem awkward to meet up or text and discuss things you don’t like, but trust me, if you know these things beforehand and discuss them, it will benefit both of you! 

The Roommate Agreement   

Before living with a roommate, you must complete the roommate agreement, a series of questions answered at the beginning of the year that indicate preferences, like your sleep schedule and tidiness. These can be different than habits, and during this discussion, consider whether your preferences mesh. If some don’t, are they a big deal, or can you make a small change to help your roommate feel comfortable? For example, I shared that I don’t particularly appreciate typing noises after I go to sleep. We agreed that if I went to sleep earlier than usual, I could ask her to type a little quieter or use a shared space until I fell asleep. Little modifications like this can drastically improve your roommate relationship and make the difference between having regular arguments or living harmoniously.  

Communication is Key  

No matter how much you try to avoid it, you will likely have occasional disagreements with your roommate. Striving to resolve your arguments as quickly as possible is essential. You don’t want you or your roommate thinking about issues for too long. As busy college students, we have other work to do, so resolving disagreements and ensuring ill feelings aren’t harbored for long is important. The most important thing to remember is to compromise with each other. Your room is a shared space, and some issues cannot accommodate both people.  

One Way to Make a Friend  

Remember: it’s fun to live with someone! Having a college roommate is a nearly universal experience, and living alone can be lonely. Having someone to experience college with to talk to about your day can make the difference between a good and a great day. It’s also one of the best ways to make a friend. If you and your roommate have shared interests, you can talk to each other or learn about a new hobby from them. Your roommate can offer great insight if you have a problem or need advice; remember, they understand better than most what you’re going through daily!